If the blessing of SMA is “Living for Today”, the curse (one of many) may be the “Reluctance to Dream.”
When SMA accosted our lives over 3 years ago we knew we could never return to the world of “It won’t happen to us”. As we wait patiently for the arrival of our daughter we know it is only by the grace of God that we stand here today. It is through God’s grace that we are having another child and His grace is allowing Jadon to meet his sister. This is something we do not take for granted. In fact, I made this shirt two years ago in case we were ever blessed with another child and Jadon wasn’t here to place his hands on momma’s belly.
Jadon is not only here but he is thriving and he is very excited to meet his little sister. Kristin has been recording BGB’s (that’s Baby Girl Burks) heartbeat at her weekly doctor visits. Jadon is simply mesmerized when she plays the recording for him. We play it at least 5 times or he gets very grumpy.
We have already had testing done and BGB is SMA free.
But like I said, we were evicted from that blissful world of “It won’t happen to us.” She doesn’t have SMA but there are a thousand and seventeen other things that could be wrong with her. How do you define “wrong?” By definition there is a lot “wrong” with Jadon but he is perfect to us. He is exactly who he was meant to be. He is our son.
We really aren’t in a state of “worry”, just simply that crazy “Reluctance to Dream.” We want to dream of her future and we want to plan all the great things she will do. Those things would be OUR dreams and OUR plans, not hers and likely not God’s.
So we will try and finish her room before she arrives and we will pray for her every night. We pray with Jadon that she will be healthy, happy, smart, beautiful, and funny. She better be funny, healthy first, but then funny.
We will welcome her into our lives in less than 7 days (WOW!!) and she will be loved unconditionally. She will have the best big brother to learn from and two parents who fully understand what a blessing she is.