Ah, I don’t really care if you call me that, in fact I resemble that remark. However, don’t call me a redneck JUST because our outside Christmas lights are still up. Not only are they still up but they burn bright every single night.
The removal of Christmas decorations has been an emotional ride every year since Jadon’s diagnosis and this year, thanks to that Stupid Elf, the emotions started on Christmas Day. We have taken the tree down and removed all resemblance of the season on the inside but the outside remains. This year our exterior illumination was limited to only Jadon’s tree.
The window above Jadon’s treatment table is our window to the world for this long, long winter and outside that window is Jadon’s tree. We look outside to check the weather in the morning (He’s the weather man at school) and at night during his breathing treatment we shut off all the lights inside and count the cars that drive by our house while listening to the radio. It’s one of our favorite things.
With the tree all lit up it adds a very nice ambiance and I ‘aint shuttin ‘er down. It’s not laziness, it would take 2 minutes to at least go unplug them, and the weather has been good enough to take them down, but it hasn’t happened.
The reason is… because we’re nervous we won’t get to do this next year. It’s really strange. The reason for our nervousness that is.
I dread saying it out loud but part of me wants to scream it at the top of my lungs. I will type it softly if you promise to read it very, very quietly. No, seriously. Maybe even look over your shoulder and make sure SMA is not reading this. Knock on wood when you’re done.
Shhhh … The reason we are so nervous is because…………….Jadon is doing awesome.
Every January we look at what the upcoming year may hold and every year SMA is all too real. This year is strangely different.
He is…hmmm … what I said above.
This is what makes us nervous. This is the most confident we have been in January since Jadon was born and THAT makes us nervous.
We will live our lives day by day like we have so effectively learned to do and we will smile with every sparkle in his eyes and every giggle on his breathe. We will dance in the rain and give thanks for it all, …buuuut…those lights are probably going to stay up a little longer.